Skilled Nursing Center for Mom

 Two days after mom's hip replacement surgery on Wednesday afternoon / evening, she was moved over to Stonehenge rehabilitation center. It was kind of a rough transfer for her that Friday morning. She had not slept at all the night before. (Hospitals are not known for giving you restful night's sleep.) The transport person was ever so kind and ever so on time. I had barely arrived at the hospital after our early morning Friday Temple shift, when Hospital nurses came in to get her ready for the transport. They had much to do, and the transport person ended up waiting about 15 minutes for her. It seemed a pretty slick operation. Just into a wheelchair, rolling into and out of the van, and going around the block. But it was very much for her. She said she felt every bump.

They left her in the Rehab place room in her wheelchair, and there needed to be some intake questions gone over with the nursing staff. In the meantime they brought lunch since it was noon. I didn't know how long I was going to be at the hospital with Mom that day, so I had packed my lunch as well. We were both going to eat when the nurse came in. Rather than have her come back later, I just had her ask me the questions if she didn't mind me answering while Mom and I ate. I guess food is kind of important to me (duh). Mom picked at her food, did not really enjoy it that much. It was pork medallions in a Dijon sauce. She doesn't like mustard. The pork was too tough for her to eat and she spit it out. And then she just kind of wilted. She just wanted to go to bed.

I was talking to her and realize that she just needed to get into bed and she basically collapsed. Right there in the chair. Her head lolled back, she made an awful noise in the back of her throat. It was all very reminiscent of a number of things. 10 years ago after dad's surgery and while in the hospital while moving, he collapsed with a stroke. Mom and Donna were there to witness it and it was awful. Two weeks ago with Dad's death, I was there..similar noises.  With Mom just being so wilted and out of it, I was thinking the same thing had happened to her! Just a day or so out of surgery, strange noise from the back of her throat, no response.. it was scary. I thought we were losing her. I did comment to the nurse that my brother Robert was going to be there in a few minutes. I hope it wasn't going to be just like when dad passed away a couple of weeks ago. David, my older brother, was coming from out of town.  David missed Dad by only 5 minutes. And sure enough--Robert came to the door and said, is she all right? And I said no, she is not! And she was not. I think she stopped breathing for a while. The nurse got oxygen on her and then Mom started throwing up. 

It could have been just that she didn't agree with a little bit of food that she ate. It could have been that she was just overwhelmed physically from the surgery, pain, transfer,.. so many things. And of course you all know how throwing up makes one feel. Awful. Drained. Pale. Shakey. Clammy.

We did finally get two assistants in there to help her into her bed and she was able to get comfortable and sleep. She was responsive, squeezed fingers, could feel her legs, etc. It was kind of scary to leave her there like that. Mom has a DNR. That means do not resuscitate. The nurse asked me about a dni when we met in the hall later. And that means do not intubate. We know that Mom doesn't want any excessive measures taken. She has said so many times, "Why am I even here? Why can't I just go?" Robert pointed out to her the following day that part of this life is enduring to the end. And you have to endure it with a smile. If you don't smile, you go to hell. Ha. So mom slapped a grin on her face and left it there for a while. I have also told her that we need to get our money's worth out of her government-taxes-paid-for-new hip. Medicare, you know? She needs to put some good mileage on that thing to get her money's worth. Or, our money's worth. This is our tax dollars at work! Robert's wife Janet I said that if she could make it to 90 years old, that would be nice. And mom agreed. So she's going to try to make it.

At least, that's what she said that day. Today she is rather down in the dumps. It's Sunday. Robert and Janet went over for a morning visit, I went over for an evening visit. She just wants to sleep. Pain pills are kind of doing a number on her. Her digestive tract is way too sluggish, and we don't feel like they are working  at it  the right way. After 87 years, mom knows what her body needs. And the nurses think that they need to do something different because that is their protocol. It is frustrating. I hope things will perk up on Monday as the weekend will be over, and maybe things will be running a little more smoothly. She is supposed to start her physical therapy on Monday. But I think she's going to be too spent to try to even try it. We do expect a lot of ups and downs through this process. It will be going on for a week or two there at the rehab place, I suspect. We shall see. And I hope to be meeting with Drs and nurses, too.

But, it has been so gratifying to see and read positive and thoughtful comments on the Facebook feed that I have posted on occasion about Mom's condition. She really is loved and appreciated by many. And I hope she knows that. I tried to share those with her this evening, but she was far to anxious to go to sleep. 

This was taken on Saturday the 25th. 

What a June!

 First off, our garden is doing well. We have had NO rain, so no weeds. Kind of nice, though I'm willing to weed more if we could please get some rain.

BUT

This month. Wow.

After Dad's funeral, we all came home and got sick. Mine was only three days. Like a head cold. Mom ended up in the ER because her blood sugar was over 500, she was confused and disoriented, weak, and just plain worn out.  That was on Tuesday the 14th. She had been home on her own at Brookdale since the 7th, isolated due to Covid for five days. She felt like she was improving, but then she took a steroid to help with all the head and chest congestion. That's what sent her sugars soaring. That and the UTI really made her so, so sick! Crazy sick. Weak. Confused, depressed.

So, I took her home with me on the 14th to manage her meds, meals, rest and exercise. She stayed for five days. Blood sugar was still high, but starting to lower, so she went back to Brookdale on the following Sunday the 19th. She was getting her appetite back, just starting to feel better and was walking to help her blood count. Her head and chest were finally clear, we got all her meds sorted out. She had even been eating in the dining room and went outside for some sunshine!

Then she fell on Tuesday the 21st while walking at Brookdale. He hit hard on her hip, fractured the femur by the ball, and had hip replacement surgery on Wednesday June 22nd at 5 pm. 

Wow. What a month!

Follow up blood tests on Friday the 17th.

In the ER, Tuesday afternoon, June 21. Exactly one week after her previous visit. She felt a lot better this time-- except she was unable to walk.

Post surgery. The smile was real. Or was it the drugs? They do have good drugs and she is keeping on top of the pain.

Looking out in our back yard garden just makes me happy.

It's a nice view from the deck.

Thursday morning, I went back to the hospital. She said she was able to sleep all night. The physical therapy guys came in and got her up, walking and weighed (114!!! Skin and bones).

Woah! First time upright since Tuesday afternoon when she fell at 2:30.

She went clear out to the hall and got weighed, then back in to eat.

Getting settled in a chair.

Brrr. Bring her some warm blankets!

Breakfast. She Loved dinner at 9 pm last night, too. She had not eaten for more than 24 hours and was hungry. Very!

She sat in the chair for about an hour, ate, got a new IV, then was ready for a nap at 11 am. I'd say that was a good day!

She'll be able to go to Stonehenge tomorrow. We think. We hope. It's a skilled nursing facility where she can get some intense physical therapy. 

I'm thinking she won't be bored for a bit!

Dad's "Graduation"

 My Dad passed away on Wednesday June 1st. I was able to go and be with Mom for dad's last 5 hours. We sat by his bedside, talked, visited. But it wasn't until mom and I went to rest lay down on her bed and chat together that he actually left. We were grateful that he was relieved of the pain and discomfort of his aged old body. I'm sure his spirit is jumping for joy. And I kind of think that he leapt right out of his body, as I heard quite a loud noise just before he passed. Kind of like a big jolt in the bed. But whatever the case, we know he is happy and content where he is now.  I had given my siblings a heads up a day or so before and we were beginning to gather. David arrived from Texas a mere five minutes after Dad died. He probably passed David in the parking lot. Robert & Janet came and were here to be with Mom by late afternoon.

It is our turn, now, to adjust to a different life. A life without dad. I know it will be difficult for Mom in some ways, but it will be easier in many others. She has been a long time caregiver for Dad since his stroke in 2012. The past few years were the most difficult, with dementia increasing and his physical health decreasing. Her physical health is decreasing as well. You know you are weak when you can't even open to ketchup bottle!. Haha

We had his funeral and burial in Provo and Bluffdale. We opted to do that since all of my children were going to have to travel, most of them long distances in order to be there. And it was only me and Mom here in Cedar. Robert's Ward was kind enough to host in their building, and the Camp Williams Veterans cemetery took care of his burial.

The thing that was most complicating, however, it was that three of us tested positive for covid the day before the funeral! Donna, mom, and me. Three key players. We made an executive decision NOT to cancel it, but to move forward. Donna and Mom were going to watch the funeral services on the live stream provided by the funeral home. That was decided when only two were covid  positive. Then when I tested positive, too, well! What do you do then? We just decided that since Mom did not want to miss dad's funeral and it made her so sad to think of missing it, that we would just mask up, double mask, use lots of hand sanitizer, social distance where we could, and hope for the best. And that is what we did. Mom and Donna did not feel really sick. They felt like they just had a head cold. Maybe a bit of a cough and a scratchy throat. I on the other hand on Tuesday was a symptomatic. I did not have any symptoms. I did cry a lot, as most of us did. Especially me and Donna. We are really boobs. But, dark glasses and masks helped a lot of that. :-) I thought the funeral went well. Robert and Donna did a great job with their talks. I was satisfied with mine. The whole funeral service only lasted a half an hour, which was the best news of all because we needed to be out at Camp Williams before 2:00 p.m. we made it. The burial went smoothly. Their grandsons did a lovely job as pall bearers, and Janet Autrey single-handedly pulled off an immense luncheon for about 50 of the family members who joined us afterwards. 

All of our children were there. Only Nick and Gail had children with them, and Caroline was missing because she also tested positive for covid and opted to stay home in Cedar City. But Nick and his four children were there along with Kaylee. Damian and Katie and Eric all came alone. All of Robert's family was there. All of Donna's family was there. And my brother David was there. So as far as family is concerned, it was a great turnout. Our cousin Keith Autrey came from back east. We were very happy to see him.  Our cousin Sandi was here with Aunt Tuny. It was good to see them. And some of Mom and Dad's closest friends from Missouri and folks they knew from Georgia we're here, as well. She was so happy to see them. Being sick meant there was social distancing and no hugs given, and that was kind of hard. But at least we got to see half of their faces, know that they cared for Mom, and felt loved.

Riding in the back seat, in comfort. Up and back in one day is hard. We had a "COVID Car" (mine) for transportation.

Donna and Mom with funeral director( from Rome!)

David.

Lots of lovely flowers

Camp Williams

Donna & Mom

Nick and Kaylee with kids and cousins

Jonathan, Seth & Gail Owens

Donna Ashwood, Damian Liebhardt

Gail, Damian, Mike, Katie, Nick (Emily)

Eric

Aunt Tuny & Sandi Lance

Those were mostly photos from my phone, but kids took more and better ones I mai include later.

I really could have used this on tuesday. Of course, it came in today's mail. This is my Avon wash off waterproof mascara. I have been out of it for months. It was available only by signing up to be on a wait list. I have been missing it for a long time and I'm so glad to get it. Too bad it's a day late.